TGIF! doesn’t exactly mean anything to me now as I am just at home doing nothing. I’m not really sure I would publish this but if I do then I guess I don’t care anymore. life is just amazing or interesting rather. We are all in the pursuit of something. Okay, to be honest, I don’t know what to write, I’m just bored and tired of enjoying my compulsory vacation. My computer screen is more familiar to ‘gumtree’ than ‘gmail’ and google is quick to bring out  ‘job’ when I type the letter J. This was not the plan.

I am no critic of London but  I wish I could scream it to the thousands of able youth queuing up in the embassy that life in the ‘western world’ as they call it, is not a fantasy,  not at all! I remember the plans I had and the feeling of conquest when I stepped my first foot on the famous grounds of Heathrow airport. I should have noticed the weary faces of those going back home but I was too excited to be bothered. I felt free, I felt like finally I could be the boss of my own self and explore the world, I even felt like I would make enough money to be able to start a venture I’ve been nurturing for years.

one year later, actually one year,two months and 10 days later, I am living my dream staring in front of this beautiful white screen they call a computer and writing to exactly no one in particular.

So, what happened? would it be safe to say life happened?dunno, you decide. I came for my masters and hoped to apply for white collar jobs but then I went to these white collar organisations and realized that the colour of the organisations were actually just white. Underemployment does not capture the situation, there should be a word like extreme extreme underemployment. Here, cleaners are branded as service providers, street and door-to-door fundraisers are branded as executive sales and marketing agents lol. I once met an MD of a bank back home during the  summer that was working as a  fundraiser, knocking on doors even in the rain and cold. Its amazing how there are always no vacancies for paid jobs but plenty of place for ‘volunteers’ they call it. They say they would give you a reference and you would gain relevant job experience, I guess that is only true if the skill of making coffee becomes a wanted attribute for employment.

Passport, the sound of that sends me into roaring laughter.  I never knew the importance of that small ‘paper jail’ till  I got here.  Testimonies of getting a permit and visa to stay receives the loudest amen in churches here. I was a novice and couldn’t really understand it when I saw loads of young girls with babies, but my economics textbooks  said there was 0% of population growth and fertility rate here I thought to myself, but then it all clicked,  Aha! those children were the routes to obtaining a permit, how sad!

Just stay where you are, there’s so so much potential in Africa. Anywhere can be your green pasture if The Lord of the harvest tells you so. I think the next time I go to the embassy, I’d carry a big poster reading “go back home, the greener pasture is here not there” because actually, there’s no green there just noisy streets and big tall buildings.